Business Majors are Stupid

February 1, 2005 | Posted by Sapphire

Great read here: Business Majors are Stupid

I’ve wondered for a long time how majoring in business somehow achieved normal college status while majoring in “woodworking” is knocked as a mere vocational pursuit.

Like having a degree in business gives you an understanding of… anything?

The really beautiful thing about MBA’s in particular is they can work in any industry. They can take over the film industry one week in the early 80’s and rip out any soul, artistry or creativity that ever existed in it…. but if they don’t find that lucrative or rewarding, they can go take over a potato chip company, or an ad company, or a Cayman islands trading company. The potential for them is limitless!

And what do we, the consumers, get out of it? A complete lack of that creative spark that made every revolutionary business that ever existed. The end of business people who have the cajones to say, “What if we did this thing no one’s ever tried?” No, folks with that sort of initiative are taken out back and shot: we must never, ever take risks in business. We must never innovate. We must stick to procedures about which we’ve already collected reams of data that supposedly prove their effectiveness.

And no teenage fashion queen ever surfed the trends like an MBA: this week, we’re only hiring idiots we can intimidate into working for nothing (put them on customer service, and we’ll never feel it). No, wait – some guy from Harvard published a study suggesting you get what you pay for with employees, so we’re going to fire all last week’s stupid people and hire the 5 most expensive applicants we can find. No, wait – someone else published something saying there’s robots that’ll do all of this for us. We haven’t yet been able to track down the source of these robots, but my assistant’s on it, and while she looks for them, I’ll just put everything on hold.

I’m relieved to know that small businesses run by real people who actually know their industry will never again have to compete with creative big business people. That could be a real advantage to the Mom & Pop shops. See, stupid can be positive!

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